Missing him badly. Is he doing well for his project?

pipi: *looks at her hp - scrutinize his picture**He as such a glowy and cheerful face in the picture* Are you ok my dear? Have you been sleeping well and eating well? Are you coping well with your project? You must be very vexed, with all the shifting of house and doing of project and going for dance at the same time. Doing the dance thing at this moment seems too much for this coming exam, i thought you might want to consider and focus on your papers first. You told me before you don't do things half way, you will make them well all the way. But the mention of you telling me that your prelim grades are average as compared to the past makes me worried about you. I feel like asking you for your exam timetable so that times when i miss you terribly, i will not disturb you but i don't dare. I'm afraid that you might find me irritating. To do that in the first place is irritating, but i thought if i know your schedule, at least i can wish you good luck for every paper.

pipi: Maybe dance is your way of relaxation, maybe you prefer to meet up with friends more. I am also your friend. Anytime you need me, i can be there. But it seems like you are afraid to meet me. You are afraid that i will beg you to come back to me. I promise i won't. I want you to be happy. I'm just afraid that you might find me bothering you like a parasite, sms-ing you at 5am in the morning telling you i can't sleep. I can't control myself, because i simply cannot sleep. Even if i do fall asleep, i keep having nightmares, nightmares of me going for events in school and other places and you left me. The images keep re-appearing in my brain. Whatever i want now doesn't matter. Whatever that is most important now is you. I want you to do well for your papers, to get your first class, to graduate with headhunters sourcing you. I want to see you smile.

pipi: i know i'm just talking to air. Afterall, this blog has been dead for sometime. It's ok, at least i can "talk" to you. I use my heart and "talk" to you, with this tiny wheeny hope that this hope will travel to your heart the next time. it's ok that i cry, that i'm sad, that i'm lonely. At least i let out my thoughts to you. Maybe you will feel it somehow. When your eyelid twitch, it's me thinking of you. Thinking about what you are doing right now. :) I'm not crazy, it's better to say out rather than coop it all in my heart. I'm a stubborn person, my friends know me well, they do not dare to disturb me at this crucial period of time.

pipi: Everywhere i walk (except this damm sch), memories of you linger. I took escalator, i rem you always let me lean on your chest and you practice your popping. You also love to rest your chin on my big head. I feel like crying again, just cannot stop thinking about you. It's my fault that you want to end it. It's all my fault that your heart dies. I'm a damm bloody self centered girl, didn't realise the times you are really lonely, didn't realise that you want my company when you go out with your dance mates. Love going pizza huts, cafe cartels, 18 chefs, lan shops pratas with you. I love to see you enjoying your food coz you are always smiling. I love to hear you talk about how you intend to practise your dance movements, how you learn new chinese songs, how the DOTA game is affecting you, how you pawn them, how your like the hair that james has done for you. I regret taking this job, that time you said "so far", i should have realise it will be quite difficult for you to meet me now that you know i'm working so far away. We are both trying to be considerate towards 1 another, no no no, i should say only you. Coz i forgot you are lonely at home. I will leave after may contract ends. I hope to spend more time with you, even though i am only now your friend. I yearn to see the happy you again.

pipi: I think i stop right now. coz it's hard to do illegal things in the office...i miss you my dear, i realli do. you are not replying me in msn again, its ok, i see you happily playing mousehunt will do. Maybe you are playing the henegg game again. I am trying to master that as well. *hugs*